


That's How Trauma is

by ImpyTricky (rychuu)



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, vr au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-01
Packaged: 2020-11-08 21:16:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20842130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rychuu/pseuds/ImpyTricky
Summary: It’s become a tradition that Kokichi worms his way into Shuichi’s room on the anniversary of their release, even after a few years. However, Kokichi isn’t sure this is a tradition they should keep.





	That's How Trauma is

Five years. It had already been five years since the Killing Game ended.

July 12th. That day happened to be a Sunday. Shuichi had been dreading it’s arrival for weeks. It made sense, he told himself. After all, they were all in the killing game for weeks before finally escaping. One might assume that a day of freedom would be a happy thing to celebrate, but all the day brought was an immense amount of heartache Shuichi couldn’t ignore.

He heard a knock on his door. Well, it brought two things, actually.

Shuichi wasn’t at all surprised that Kokichi had picked the lock of the front door and entered his house without permission. He wasn’t surprised to hear him knocking on his door, quiet and soft in stark contrast to his normal demeanor. In fact, After five years, Shuichi had grown to expect these little traditions. They were the only things that got him out of bed that day.

He quietly made his way over to the bedroom door and opened it, looking down at Kokichi with tired eyes. Kokichi also had bags under his eyes, and his hair was messier than normal. He looked borderline disheveled and, had Shuichi not known better, would have assumed that he had gotten into some serious trouble.

Well, technically, they both  _ were _ in trouble. That’s why he silently moved out of the way and allowed Kokichi to enter his bed room.

Kokichi was oddly quiet, but Shuichi didn’t expect him to speak. Instead, he simply grabbed a bottle of grape soda he had prepared in advanced and handed it to Kokichi, who took it and started quietly sipping at it. They were both sitting on the bed, Kokichi leaning against Shuichi and Shuichi against him. Before long, Kokichi snaked his hand around Shuichi’s arm and clung to it.

“… I brought some movies and a box set of some cartoons if you wanna watch stuff,” Kokichi muttered, breaking the silence. “It’s all stuff we’ve never watched before, so…”

“Mmm…” Shuichi sighed and gave a shrug. “Sounds fine.”

Shuichi had expected Kokichi to immediately grab the distractions he prepared and get their little session started, but Kokichi didn’t move. He stared up at Shuichi, tired eyes searching his features. 

Then, Kokichi looked away.

“We can’t keep doing this.”

Shuichi’s heart skipped a beat at the words, surprised by both Kokichi’s words and his own reaction to them. “What do you mean?”

“We can’t keep  _ doing _ this,” Kokichi growled. His grip on the plastic bottle of his soda tightened. “We just… sit here and watch movies and TV. shows every year, and it doesn’t–it doesn’t get better. It doesn’t get easier. In fact, it just feels like it’s getting  _ worse!” _

Shuichi could feel his chest tighten, pain swelling in his heart and threatening to make it burst. He understood what Kokichi was saying, but it still felt like a rejection of sorts. “I… I don’t think it’s getting  _ worse…” _

“Well, this sure isn’t helping.” The way Kokichi seemed so upset, so angry, it made Shuichi feel at fault. “I don’t know. I don’t know what to do. I want to move on. I want to get the hell over it. Should–should we… should we  _ talk _ about it?”

Kokichi grimaced at his own words, and Shuichi could feel him shaking. “We don’t have to talk about it…”

“Then–then how do we make it stop?” Kokichi wheezed and laughed, but the laughter was strained. “How come the others can move on but–but it feels like we’re just stuck here?”

Shuichi hesitated to respond, but when he did, he rested a hand on Kokichi’s. “I don’t think they’ve moved on either, to be honest.”

The idea bewildered Kokichi, and he turned to face him with furrowed brows.

“I mean… Maybe they’re just like us, trying to get through the day and forget what happened. Maybe they’re just… better at hiding it than others. Kaede always tends to be really busy today. Kaito too.” Shuichi started tracing his thumb over the back of Kokichi’s hand. “We’re all just trying to move on still, in the end. That’s kind of… how being traumatized works. You never stop trying to move on.”

Kokichi fell silent at this, frowning and hanging his head. Shuichi let the silence speak for him, and only continued to trace his thumb across Kokichi’s hand in an attempt to bring him comfort. “At least… We don’t have to be alone through it. Even if we all try to move on differently, we still have each other.”

Kokichi glanced up at Shuichi, lips pressed into a tight line, before he finally spoke. “… I want to talk about it.”

“Huh?”

Kokichi’s eyes narrowed slightly, and Shuichi couldn’t ever recall Kokichi wearing such a serious expression. “I want to talk about what happened. I do. I really do.” His voice wavered, and that seriousness warped into fear. “I just. You know. I don’t…Talking about it, and…”

Shuichi moved, slowly and gently, until he had pulled Kokichi into a warm embrace. “I know. You don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to talk about… but if you really want to, then I’m here for you.”

Shuichi swore he saw tears glittering in Kokichi’s eyes as he buried his face into Shuichi’s shoulder. “… Thank you, Shuichi.”


End file.
